Birthed from your Heart...

It is often said that adopted children are birthed from your heart... and as I sit with this idea it is really, in so many ways, a perfect description..

When conceiving and birthing a child biologically you sacrifice your body A LOT.  When conceiving and birthing a child from your heart you sacrifice your heart A LOT.  This is in no means saying your heart isn't involved in bio birth (everyone worries for and loves their unborn child in a very special and unique way, and perhaps runs into the doctor for every slight worry...) or your body in a heart birth (vaccines, flying across the world sometimes staying in uncomfortable conditions etc.).  But back to the comparison...   As your biological child is growing within you, your body is being stretched to the point where you are certain there is no more room, you sign on the dotted line for aches till its over, there are a number of things you sacrifice eating and doing in hopes that it will help your child be born as healthy as possible.   And just when you are quite certain you cannot take it anymore you enter the most painful physical phase and finally have your child in your arms.  As your adoptive child is growing within your heart, your heart is being stretched to the point where you are quite certain there is no more room.  You are forced to sacrifice essentially any control over the situation you might have thought you had.  You are forced to put faith in people thousands of miles from you to care for and do whatever it takes to get you to your child as fast as possible.  You think of them possibly hungry or sick or lonely and your heart swells and there is absolutely nothing you can do.  You sign on the dotted line to have an ache in your heart until they are home.  I would say any parent that has had to watch their child in a hospital or something similar probably knows a similar ache (with the exception that I imagine there is a great deal more fear added to the equation in the hospital situation).  Having your child home in your arms, safe and healthy is 100% in the hands of God and other people...with very little you can do aside from signing consent forms.   But for many of us that have been blessed to never know that... it is different from many of the worries you get when you are pregnant.  If you worry when you are pregnant that you haven't felt the baby move, you have the ability to sit and put your hands on your tummy and wait... and if that doesn't calm your concerns you can drive to a doctor and have them calm your concerns.... the ache you feel in this case, you really have no option for calming them except for a lot of prayer and faith.  And just when you think you cannot take it anymore you enter the most painful phase of having held your child and now leaving them and waiting at home for them until you can go get them again, and then finally have your child in your arms again.  Both cases require a lot of sacrifice, rooted in the selfless love of a parent for their child, and at times pain, but to hold and have the greatest gift.

What is the same....

1.  Your desire to have them.  I walked around life repeating my key phrase "I hate wait" with each and every one of my kids.  I want them in my arms... period....  I am eager to love them, and touch them and have them home.
2. Who's child they are.  There are many people with no ill intent whatsoever, say hurtful things "real parent" or "your OWN children".....   But you see, phrases like this simply neglect to recognize who these children REALLY are.  Every one of my children, biological and adopted, are God's children first.  He created them and gifted them to me...  we don't create life, we are open to life and God creates it.  So, really, none of them are "my own".... yet I love them all completely as the amazing gift God has given to me.  And a real parent is one that says "yes" to that child and lays down their life (and body and heart) to love them unconditionally.
3.  The love.  Any parent knows, you can look at beautiful child after beautiful child (and honestly, EVERY child is BEAUTIFUL), and talented child after talented child.... yet there is something very different when you are looking at YOUR child, or watching YOUR child present you with the most beautiful drawing of them with you etc. etc.  There is a fullness in your heart, a confirmation "He's/She's mine" and and whatever they are and do is presented to your heart differently.  An amazing differently.... and there is something about those faces that make every suffering you went thru throughout their "birth" (either body or heart) fade away. THAT is the same with every child God gifts to you.