Ahhhh the waiting!!!

Ahhhh I have reached a point of adoption insanity, and I need to preach at myself, so I might as well let you all in on my preaching lol Anything you might find inspirational, don't think that it has ANYTHING to do with me being an inspiration.... its what I need to hear, so therefore I'm the exact opposite LOL A lot really has happened in the last few weeks, timeline wise. It'll probably make my october update in a week and a half less exciting, but we are unofficially number 8. Three people have gone off the list, and I found out that one family is on hold till February.... that was so exciting! And there are some scenarios where as few as two children would get me a referral.. but then you can play out other scenarios on the wait list and it will be a bit longer wait.. The wait has become difficult, the yearning is worse than a pregnant mom past her due date (but a very similar feeling minus the extreme discomfort!). It's hard to explain to someone that has not been through it... but I can feel a connection to this child, and I haven't seen them yet. I can FEEL that they are out there. There was a long time that I knew God was going to bring us to a child, wasn't quite sure which child, and wasn't quite sure when.... that has moved to a placed where I can FEEL that that child is already enroute to us. So I seek information.... WAY more than I probably should LOL Anything that can give me an idea of how much longer till I see their face, and usually very little is given. Things are unpredictable. Some weeks the agency gets news of several children, some weeks none... and its not easy to predict how fast any child will be paper ready. And I can sense that I need to stay in the present. I need to live in the now and walk at the pace God is going. The answers WILL NOT be there until He wills them to be there. I cannot find a route myself, and cannot make a path that is not there... I HAVE to walk with Him. I have to WAIT on Him and I have to have faith in that timing. And in reality I don't want anything but that timing, and the informational brick walls are probably reminders to me that I did not get here by any of my own doing, and I will not get anywhere by my own doing... so why seek information? Will it shorten my wait? Will it give me ANY more control? No, if anything it will take away from me “walking in faith”... and “waiting on Him” Each time I feel that tug, I must offer it up in prayer for my child, in hopes that our wait is almost over, and we can move toward seeing them for the first time. Please pray for us!!! Pray for our child. Pray for referrals to come quickly! Pray for grace during the wait. Please don't pray for patience!!! Patience=more waiting LOL In all reality, even though every day seems like a year, it probably wont be that much longer till we have exciting news to share!!! God Bless you all and thank you so much for sharing every little step of this journey with us!!